I stand a few steps away, hands hanging uselessly at my sides as I stare at the freshly engraved name on the stone.

Alinta.

My biological mother.

My mother who have given birth to me but couldn't raise me - now lies beneath this land in...peace, I hope.

Just a few hours ago, people stood here murmuring condolences, offering sympathetic glances. Now they are leaving one by one, I don't know who they were, they don't know who I was.

It's comical

How people remember you only after you are gone.

They come back, trying to show their concern - talk about the 'memories'

But who am I to judge? I did the same, didn't I? I came only after she was gone. When Elias called informing about her death, I didn't know what to do. How I told it to Liam and Stella, the look of confusion and horror on their faces still fresh in my mind.

I didn't know what else to do but leave

See her before she takes rest forever

That's the least I could do, right?

The smell of damp earth surrounds the air. My chest tightens sharply, like something heavy being lowered inside me. I should feel something clear but it's all tangled up in my head

Grief, Anger, Confusion

The pain still lingers, her death reminds me of my father's. It's like the moment coming back again - the call about his death, aunt Lia picking me from school. He was just laughing with us at breakfast but by lunch he was gone.

They all leave, don't they?

I knew it but I didn't wanna face it so soon.

I thought maybe I could come back and talk to her but I didn't. Not when I had the chance and now it's too late. I don't even know what she thought of me in the end.

Did she regret me?

Did she miss me?

Did she die thinking I hate her?

There were questions I gulped inside, distance that I made, resentment that I couldn't understand. I thought I had time. I thought I could come back to it when things were quieter, when I was less angry, when the truth didn't feel like a betrayal.

I should have listened

I should have asked why

I should have forgiven faster

My jaw tightens as I press my tongue to the roof of my mouth, forcing myself not to break down here. I did the same back then, bottling everything up until I felt numb and the feeling passed away.

I rub my palm over my face. - remembering the expressions of my mom when she got to know about Alinta, about the fact that I knew. She looked angry at Elias, sorrowful for Alinta, but mostly guilty towards me.

She apologized to me multiple times. What could I say to her? I wasn't angry at her. At least they gave me a chance even though I couldn't do anything for them in return

I couldn't do anything for anyone

Not my father, my mother, Liam, Mia, Aunt Lia, Alinta... Jasmine? No one

I wonder what everyone thought of me after this, I couldn't face them in a real conversation after coming back. It felt weird and awkward.

But I still feel their presence behind me - Liam and Mia. My shoulders sag down as I take a deep breath, before stepping back and turning to face them.

They don't speak, they don't need to. They just provide silent support without any questions. I shove my hand into the pocket of my pants, fisting it to stop the tremble

"I am sorry" That's the only word I could manage to mutter out after two days of coming here. I don't know what I am apologizing for, mostly for everything. It feels right to say

Liam's eyebrows furrows portraying an expression a mix of concern and something else. Mia steps forward, I could clearly see the tears she is holding in her eyes. It fills me with guilt.

Her hand comes forward, holding my arm in an anchoring grip "Let's go home, please"

...

Charlie isn't eating

He sniffs the bowl, nudges the food once with his nose then sits back looking uninterested, tail flicking lazily but eyes dull.

I crouch beside him, fingers resting against the cold floor "You are not hungry either, huh?" I murmur

He lifts his head up slightly and blinks at me with those eyes. He lets out a soft grumble - not his usual demanding and grumpy one.

"You miss her" I mutter, realising the reason of his behavior.

Charlie followed her everywhere, curling on her lap or sneaking into her bed. Also tolerating her cuddles and hugs, that he only reserves for some people.

After coming back from India, he has been down unlike his usual self. He is dull.

I sigh, scooping him up gently. He doesn't protest - just settles against my chest and tucks his head under my chin "At least one of us should eat, right? " I whisper "Let's get you some treats, maybe that will bring back your appetite"

I gently pick him up carefully, walking down the hallway to take him back to my room and feed him some of his treats.

"This isn't normal, mom!"

I stop in my tracks, hearing the familiar voice of Liam - filled with anger. I frown in confusion, reluctantly walking towards the study where the voices are coming from.

"I know" I hear mom's soft voice from the creak of the door "I am watching him too but I don't know what to do!"

"He is shutting down" Liam snaps "I have seen this before. After Dad...this is exactly what happened! He stopped talking, stopped asking for help and pretended he was fine until he was not."

My grip tightens unconsciously around Charlie before loosening again.

"He won't even meet Allison" Liam continues, his voice barely conceding "I can't watch him like that again. I can't lose any more!"

I feel my body tense up at the desperateness in his tone. Feeling a gulp form in my throat, I wanna walk in and tell him I am fine but I am not. I don't know what to do either.

I don't want to be the reason for their worries

"Did...did you try to contact Jasmine?" Mom asks, carefully. I feel my chest tighten at her mention.

"That's the worst part" Liam says, anger occupying his tone. "She is unreachable. Calls are unanswered, messages are unread. And Lucas? He keeps checking his phone. Stella says something might have happened there but what! This is too much for him, the sudden exposure, her death and now Jasmine disappearing"

I back away, before they can notice me standing there. Their voices fade away as I move farther away from the study. I climb the stairs almost blankly, feeling an undeniable uncomfortable feeling inside me.

I nudge the door open, letting Charlie down onto the ground. I feel a buzz in my head, like an alarm that I try to ignore. My hand instinctively reaches for his treat jar and shackles it into a bowl.

They worry too much

I repeat in my head, lowering the bowl on the floor.

She must be busy or caught up with something

My eyes falls on my phone, kept cold on the desk. My hand reaches for it again only to face the same blank screen with no notifications.

My hand trembles as I unlock the phone, looking at the number of calls sent, left unanswered. The messages delivered but unread.

My thumb hovers over her name feeling the questions build up. Why isn't she picking up? Did something happen? Is her family stopping her? Does she not wanna talk to me after what happened?

No

Jasmine isn't like that

I let out a deep exhale before calling her again and taking the phone to my ear, hearing the ring one after another. I feel my knees giving out but I hold the desk to stabilize myself.

It goes unanswered.

I type fast, sending one message after another.

Please Jasmine, reply. Tell me you are okay.

Tell me you are there

Please Jasmine

I know you wouldn't leave me. I am hanging on to this hope because of your love.

Please, my love. Forgive me

The room suddenly feels suffocating, tilting in a concerning manner. My breathing turns shallow, I take deep breaths to calm myself but the air doesn't reach my lungs. My vision blurs at the edges, I feel the things in my room move.

She wouldn't leave without saying anything.

She wouldn't disappear like this.

Unless something happened

My chest tightens painfully, like an invisible hand crushing around my heart. I press my palm flat against it, trying to ground myself.

Breathe

Just breathe

What if something happened to her?

What if she is hurt?

What if she tried to call and I missed it?

What if I lose her too?

My hands start shaking, the walls feel like they are closing in, trying to swallow me. I push back from the desk too quickly, dizziness slamming into me. My vision goes white, almost too bright that it hurts. I stumble back on my foot

I hear Charlie's soft, concerned sound. I try to look around and locate him, knocking off a vase creating a loud crashing sound.

"I can't-" I gasp out for air

I feel my legs give out, a sharp pain shooting through my head shoulders before my body hits the floor.

***

I let out a sharp gasp, my eyes shot open. I rub my eyes, trying to clear my blurry vision. I could hear the soft hum of machines, watching the white walls become more visible.

Hospital

The realisation sinks slowly

My head throbs as I blink, still disoriented. The reminders of the dream still clings to me - the grave, the voices, the unanswered calls, the suffocating fear of losing her.

No

She is back. She is here with me. Nothing happened

I was just dreaming about the past few days

My fingers twitch against the sheets, expecting to find Charlie here but he is being taken care of by loren back at home along with buddy. Is he eating properly now?

"It was... a dream," he whispers, trying to remind myself

I swallow hard, feeling my throat dry before pushing myself up with a soft groan. I reach out for the glass of water kept on the table alongside my bed, the IV line tugs my hand at the outstretch. I chug down the whole glass, trying to suppress the weird feeling.

My gaze falls on the vase, which is now filled with fresh flowers instead of the withering ones - small white flowers along with a few sunflowers peeking through.

Jasmine is here

Ignoring the dull ache in my shoulder, I swing my legs off the bed, gripping the IV stand to steady myself before pushing myself up on my feet.

"Okay..." I mutter, knuckles turning white around the metal pole. Tugging off a wire off my fingers, I slowly move towards the door with the support of the IV pole as it wheels beside me.

I move towards the door and pull it open, finding the corridor empty and rather quiet than usual.

Where is everyone?

I hear faint voices

My eyebrows furrow together as I take a hesitant step towards the family room, the floor cold against my bare feet. The closer I get to the door, the clearer the voices become.

"I don't care what excuses they have" Liam's voice cuts through "What they did to him was unforgivable"

I freeze near the door, looking through the small glass opening

"I am sorry" Jasmine mutters, standing in front of Liam who looks a lot different "I didn't mean for that to happen. Due to my family's matter he got dragged into it. I know it's not an excuse-"

"I am disgusted by them, Jasmine" Liam cuts her off, his expressions contracted in anger "By their behaviour, their thinking and their judgement. They disgust me" He mutters, his voice drops lower

I could see the tense atmosphere inside. Stella steps close to Liam, trying to calm him down but he doesn't look at her. Jasmine's shoulders lumps down, Mia stands beside her - rubbing her arm in silent support.

"I know" She says softly "I have talked to them, my family is sorry for their behaviour. I couldn't blame them either because I have hid a lot from them too. While Kavya is being handled by her family for her actions"

Liam takes a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose "Doesn't make everything normal, the way everything was revealed and how they behaved about the inheritance and all!"

My jaw clenches at his words, it takes me back to the conversation that day.

"I want you to remember this, Jasmine" He says, in a firm tone that makes everyone straighten up "Tell your family this too: he is a Williams, he is our brother and nothing can change that. I wouldn't think twice about writing off Nyx in his name if that's what it takes to prove to them he is my brother. But I don't want to seek validation from those people."

My eyes widen at his words, feeling a sudden twist in my stomach as his words sink in. The concern that lingers beneath all that fury. I know he cares a lot, beyond the limit I could think of but I wouldn't want him to do that.

I open the door slowly before this conversation heats up further. Everyone's heads turn at the new presence - Jasmine's the first one to move towards me, reaching out for my arm.

My mother stands so fast her chair scrapes loudly against the floor "Lucas, carefully-"

"I am fine" I say, even though my voice sounds weaker.

I step forward, taking the support of the stand and closing the door behind me. Jasmine's fingers gently wrap around my forearm, almost hesitantly. Her eyes wide and filled with concern.

I meet Liam's gaze, his anger evaporating into air instantly, taking a worried turn "Lucas, you shouldn't be out of bed" He says, his tone disapproving yet concerned

"You should sit" Mia mutters softly, already pulling a chair towards me.

"Stop"

Everyone stills on my command

"This isn't anyone's fault," I start slowly, my heart pounding as I force the words out of myself "Not hers, not her family's, not yours" Liam opens his mouth to say something but I shake my head before he can.

"I don't blame you," I tell her softly, her breath shudders as her eyes flicker with some suppressed emotions "I never did. I don't blame anyone. The truth had to come out one day, right? Yes, It was the wrong way but it's the past now. I wanna move on, please"

I turn back to my family. "I don't want anger or accusations. I don't want people fighting because of me. I am fine, I am living and breathing. You all are with me, right? So what's the point of this?"

Liam's expression flatters down to a guilty one, he takes a deep breath before rubbing his palm on his face "I am sorry" He says, looking at Jasmine "I don't blame you, it came out wrong but I was angry and frustrated at them, wanting it to be out. I stepped out of line. I am sorry"

Jasmine quickly shakes her head "It's alright, I understand that. You didn't do anything wrong, anyone would defend their loved one like that. I feel the same" She mutters, glancing at me before looking at him again.

"We are not doing this anymore, no dragging this further" My mom says, stepping closer to me "We all are here for you, open for your questions, to talk, anything you need. As a family" She adds, placing her warm hand against my cheek - her eyes slightly moist.

"I know, mom" I let out a soft sigh, squeezing her hand gently. "I want you all to know that I am fine too, I will be better soon when we all keep that part aside and move forward. I don't want this conversation to be brought up again. Please"

"Lucas is right" Aunt Lia says in agreement "It's his choice, until he says we will not be mentioning this again. Okay?"

I watch them look at each other, a flicker of understanding crossing their expressions before they all nod, small smiles appearing on their faces

"You know it's time for a family hug!" Mia chirps suddenly. Before I could react, she was already hugging me - her body angled sideways to avoid my injured shoulder.

I chuckle, wrapping my arm around her. Mom and aunt Lia also join us, I watch Liam who sighs softly before reluctantly walking over and wrapping his arms around them.

"F

amily Hug, girls" Aunt Lia points out, opening her arm. Jasmine and Stella glance at each other before wiggling into us.

As the circle closes around me, warmth replaces the pain in my heart. For the first time in days, I don't feel like I am about to fall apart.